Funny to read that Vonage is offering defecting customers a $3.99/month for a year deal to stick around. As one of those defecting customers, I find it hysterical. No, Vonage hasn’t pitched me this deal. Then again, I’ve been ignoring the junk mail from them so maybe they have. When I canceled the service last month after 2 years, they asked me why. I answered: “Because I work from home and Vonage call quality has been going steadily downhill and I have no confidence that the quality will improve. I need to have more reliable phone service, so I’ve switched to Verizon.” I never said that price had anything to do with it. I was clear that my top priorities right now were quality and reliability. If I’m switching from $24.99 with Vonage to $44.99 a month with Verizon, that has to say something about where I’m coming from, right? If you want to retain me as a customer, offer me what I said I want. Tell me how you’re investing in technology so folks won’t say over and over again, “Are you calling from your cell phone? You’re breaking up. I can’t understand you.”

Comcast has also been calling asking why I left. They’re not offering any special deals on the service I had before…on the contrary, would you believe they have the nerve to try and get me back by pitching their “Triple Play”??? Phone, Internet and Cable TV for $99 per month for a year (rather than the $200 or so it would normally cost with the premium channels we like). So let me get this straight. I had just 2 of your 3 services before. I left because the service quality was poor due to faulty underground cabling (which wasn’t helping my Vonage connections, I’m sure). I know I’m not the only one. Every other house in my development has a satellite dish in front or behind it. So how is offering me more crap for less a better deal? I don’t get it.

A couple of months ago I called eFax to turn off a C3 fax number that we never actually used. We have another eFax number that’s used for everything. We were paying $16.95 a month for it for nothing. So the lady on the phone kept trying to give it to us for 3 more months absolutely free! Look, I said, just cancel it. If I don’t use the number, what difference does it make if I keep it for another 3 months? I know you’re hoping that I’ll forget to call in 3 months to cancel and you’ll get another $16.95 out of us, and then you make it free again, and so on and so on. But it’s not going to happen. So just CANCEL IT NOW. She did.

Note to vendors: When you ask me why I’m canceling my service, and you want to entice me to stay or come back, listen to the reason I’m giving you and respond to that. Don’t assume that customers only care about financial incentives. Sometimes, quality and reliability are worth paying for. Apple figured that out a long time ago.